From the JOKIN' AROUND DISK by LEEJAN ENTERPRISES P.O. Box 66. Happy Valley. South Australia. 5159. COMPUTER DICTIONARY Most computer owners are not electronic/or computer experts....though when reading magazines, articles etc..they use terms, abbreviations, and computer slang known only to the informed. With the following dictionary even you can understand it! 8086 - The year you finally pay off your computer. 8087 - The year you finally pay off your peripherals. 8088 - The year your spouse forgives you for buying the computer. Address - Type of attire worn by some female programmers. Algol - The husband of Polygol, their missing daughter is Polygon. Altair - A place where computers are sacraficed. Array - A blast from a CRT. Backup - Opposite of forward. Branch - A stick used for beating. Buffer - A programmer who works in the nude. Coding - An addictive drug. Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors. Cp/m - Program listing for 'Look in the evening section'. Cpu - C3po's mother. Dip - Inventor of a famous switch. Disk Drive - A motor for a frisbee. Duplex - Having two apartments. Forth - One of the top five computer languages. GiGo - Garbage in garbage out. Ibm - In London a frequent answer to the question 'Where is the tourguide? "I be 'im." IC - Understanding as in 'Oh, IC'. Initailize - Carving your initials on a floppy disk. Interate - A healthy illiterate. Joystick - A peripherial intended for use only by consenting adults. Keyboard - Resembling a typewritter, a keyboard is used for entering errors into the computer. Kilo - What you could have spent your money on if you hadn't bought the computer. Language - A system of organizing and defining syntax errors. Math Chip - A piece of a broken abacus. Megabyte - A nine course dinner. Memory Map - A sheet of paper showing location of computer store. Mhz - Acronym for 'Megahurtz', meaning 'a million pains'. Microfiche - Sardines. Nanosecond - Mork's stunt man. Newdos - Acronym for 'Not Exactly What The Dealer Offers To sell you. Pascal - Computer language used for college football player's Known in full as `Pass Calvin or Else'. Password - The nonsense word taped to the CRT. From the JOKIN' AROUND DISK by LEEJAN ENTERPRISES P.O. Box 66. Happy Valley. South Australia. 5159.